Reconnect with each other.
Couples Therapy & Marriage Counseling in Salem, Massachusetts
You’re tired of feeling disconnected from each other.
It’s like You can’t seem to get on the same page.
Do these scenarios sound familiar?
You and your partner are looking for couples therapy in Salem because your relationship is struggling. When disagreements arise, you’re both left feeling unheard and misunderstood. Arguments escalate quickly as criticism and defensiveness take control. Even worse, nothing gets resolved after fights — issues either get buried or avoided altogether.
This negative pattern has impacted the trust between you. You wonder if your partner truly has your back anymore. The passion and excitement you once shared has waned, giving way to an emotional gap that makes you feel lonesome.
You both miss the connection and spark you used to have.
Betrayals may have also compromised trust. You want to voice unresolved hurts and rebuilds your relationship on honesty and understanding.
Substance issues could be contributing as well. If that’s the case, you know that creating healthy routines together is key to reviving your bond.
Or maybe your relationship is still basically good, but you want to be proactive before small gaps become major rifts. You know relationships require ongoing work — work you're ready and willing to do.
Your common goal is to heal, reconnect, and strengthen your partnership. You're eager to break unhealthy patterns so you can move forward in a positive direction again, together. That's where couples therapy in Salem comes in.
You and your partner are…
Struggling with communication breakdowns.
Exhausted by the unresolved conflicts and resentments.
Ready to repair the trust.
Missing the friendship and spark that you used to have.
Here’s what we’ll do together
Couples therapy can help you grow closer.
During couples therapy in Salem, you and your partner will learn new ways of relating to each other. Practicing this new skill will transform your relationship over time.
We'll work to create an environment where you both feel safe being vulnerable. This will allow you to discuss difficult topics openly and honestly. You'll finally be able to address hurts from the past and begin the healing process.
You'll develop communication tools and strategies to stop arguments before they spiral out of control. An essential part of the process will be listening to each other, understanding one another's perspectives, and expressing your own needs effectively. This will help you feel more connected and supported. The two of you will feel more at peace with each other.
Making a habit of showing love, admiration, and appreciation seems simple. But it's so important for your marriage. It nurtures your friendship and acts as a buffer when conflicts come up. You can start small — grab breakfast at Red's Bakery or get ice cream at Melt Ice Cream. Throughout couples therapy in Salem, you’ll practice thoughtful gestures and appreciation to make them second nature.
We'll work on establishing shared routines that reinforce your bond so you feel more connected as a couple. Take romantic strolls along Salem Harbor, try a new restaurant at Pickering Wharf, or explore local haunts together like the Witch House. Day trips to Crane Beach, Marblehead, or Gloucester will also help you reconnect. Over time, these new habits and skills will enable you to relate as true partners and a team.
The goal is to learn how to break negative cycles and improve your understanding of one another. This will help you move forward together in a healthier, more fulfilling direction. With effort and willingness, couples therapy can provide you with a roadmap to get there.
Couples Therapy Will Teach You the Necessary Skills & Tools to Transform the Relationship…
Throughout couples therapy, you and your partner will learn practical skills to improve interactions between the two of you.
Based on the Gottman Institute’s research and my own observations, learning and practicing these skills tend to transform marriages in the following ways:
Emotional Safety
Partners feel secure being vulnerable with each other
There's less walking on eggshells or fear of conflict
Both people feel accepted and understood, even during disagreements
Conflict Patterns
Arguments become more productive and less hostile
Couples can disagree without it threatening their relationship
Recovery from fights is faster and repair attempts are more successful
Small issues stay small instead of escalating into major fights
Day-to-Day Connection
There's more joy and playfulness in everyday interactions between the two of you
Partners notice and appreciate each other more
Small moments of connection become natural and frequent
Both people feel seen and valued in daily life
Intimacy and Closeness
Physical and emotional intimacy tends to improve
Partners stay curious about each other rather than assuming they know everything
There's a deeper sense of friendship underlying the romance
Trust becomes more solid and reliable
Individual Growth
Partners feel supported in pursuing personal goals
There's room for being your own person within the relationship
Both people can grow and change while staying connected
Resilience
The relationship becomes more stable during hard times
You quickly recover from misunderstandings, miscommunications, or hurt feelings
There's confidence that your relationship can handle whatever comes up (job loss, health challenges, etc.)
Shared Purpose
The relationship has deeper meaning beyond day-to-day logistics
Partners feel like they're building something meaningful together (ie: working towards shared goals like saving for a dream home)
There's a sense of being on the same team in life
Shared dreams and values become clearer
Mental and Physical Health
Both partners usually experience less chronic stress
There's often improvement in sleep quality and immune function
Mental health tends to improve with better relationship security
The home environment becomes more consistently peaceful
It's worth mentioning that "mastery" of these skills does NOT equal perfection — even the happiest of couples still have conflicts, hard days, and interactions they aren’t proud of. The difference is they have the necessary tools to repair after the fact.
The amount of progress a couple makes depends on many factors, including (but not limited to) their commitments to:
Each other and the relationship
The therapy process and the change process
Taking care of themselves (ie, their own mental health, personal growth, self-reflection, etc.)
What Should We Expect?
Below is a breakdown of the couples therapy sessions.
Before we start the process of infidelity recovery, I do a thorough and comprehensive assessment on all the couples I work with. This is standard practice done by Gottman trained couples therapists. The assessment phase is comprised of three 90-minute sessions.
Here is what that looks like for you:
Session One: 90 Minutes, Couple Together
I want to know about your relationship’s history. I’ll be asking questions about things such as: how you met, why you chose each other, what dating looked like for you, how you decided to get married, what you remember from your wedding and honeymoon, what the transition to becoming parents was like (if applicable), the happy times, and the stressful times.
These questions are intentional and give me a lot of context and detail for what your dynamic is like currently and how it’s been in the past.
Session Two: 90 Minutes, Each Partner is Seen Individually for 45 Minutes
I want to give you each a chance to talk to me privately about your narrative of the issues in the relationship, as well as your goals for couples therapy.
I will also ask questions about you as an individual person: your mental health, family history, relationship history, substance use, etc.
Please note: secrets are not kept in couples therapy. If the affair hasn’t ended, or if there is contact with the affair partner, etc., I will be making a plan with the betraying partner to tell their spouse during the following session.
In between sessions 2 and 3, I will email both of you a 480-question survey (“Relationship Checkup Survey”) about your relationship.
You both get the same survey, but your answers are kept private and only I am able to see them. Under no circumstances will I ever share your answers with your partner.
The software that scores your survey will give us an overview of the strengths of your relationship, as well as the challenges. This overview will serve as a road map for the couples therapy moving forward.
Session 3: 90 Minutes, Couple Together
During this session we will go over the Relationship Checkup Survey. You will be given information about the strengths and challenges of your relationship based on your answers, and what it will look like during therapy to address the issues. Theory and research are discussed so that you have an understanding for why we’re doing what we’re doing.
Most of the time, the results of the survey are not surprising to the couple. But, it is helpful to talk about where these problems come from and what they look like in practice, not just in theory, as well as what it looks like to change them. It also gives some hope to see your strengths as a couple highlighted.
Session 4 and Beyond
During the subsequent sessions, we will focus on the 3 phases of infidelity counseling (see above). When clients ask how long the overall process takes, I typically say to plan for 1-2 years. That doesn’t necessarily mean we’ll meet every week for that long, but it does typically mean that your relationship is in the healing phase for that amount of time. Of course, this varies by couple and could be longer (ie: if there have been multiple affairs, the level of remorse and honesty, the willingness of each partner to be open and vulnerable, etc).
Go from this…
“You never listen to me!”
“I only did this because you did that!”
Yelling, slamming doors, or threatening divorce during disagreements.
Eye-rolling, sarcasm, name-calling.
To this…
Talk about your emotions and express a need.
Take responsibility and own up to your behavior without blaming your partner.
Take a break and self-soothe when emotions are running high.
Validating your partner’s perspective even if you have a different perspective.
What can we expect from couples therapy in Salem?
Throughout couples therapy in Salem, you and your partner will learn practical skills to improve communication between you. You'll discover new ways to express yourselves, actively listen, and understand each other's perspectives. This will foster a deeper sense of connection and empathy between you.
Our sessions together will empower you and your partner with tools to navigate conflicts constructively. You'll gain insight into the underlying dynamics behind your disagreements and develop strategies to resolve conflicts respectfully. This will nurture mutual growth and understanding.
Even after significant breaches, trust can be rebuilt between you and your partner. You'll learn techniques to repair broken trust, rebuild transparency, and establish a solid foundation to weather life's challenges together.
I'll help you and your partner rediscover emotional intimacy that may have been lost.
Our sessions will explore reasons behind emotional distance. You'll gain strategies to reconnect, foster vulnerability, and nurture a deep emotional bond so you feel like lovers again, not just roommates.
Couples therapy in Salem is a good fit if…
Are committed to your relationship, but feel stuck when it comes to how to improve it.
Are open to feedback and changing your behavior both in session and at home.
Are interested in the science and research behind what makes relationships go the distance.
Want additional resources for learning like books, blog articles, and podcasts.
Couples therapy in Salem is not a good fit if…
You’re not willing to work on your behavior and you’d rather blame your spouse for the problems.
There is ongoing domestic violence or infidelity you aren’t willing to be honest about.
One or both of you are strongly considering divorce. Look at discernment counseling instead.
You are set on divorce and are only looking for mediation or coparenting support.
Contact me today to start couples therapy in Salem.
Questions?
FAQs about couples therapy in Salem
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Yes! The methods I use in couples therapy sessions are supported by over 40 years of scientific research with thousands of couples.
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This is a valid concern. In any case of marital problems, family members and friends almost always “take a side,” so it’s understandable to be concerned your couples therapist will do the same thing.
In every conflict, I believe each of you have your own individual perspective, and you both are right. You each come from their own specific background of experiences, beliefs, and values. Rather than litigating “the facts”, it’s more important for both partners to learn to effectively express themselves and validate each other.
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Ending the relationship is a serious decision that only you and your partner can make. It’s not my place or my role to advise whether or not your relationship should continue. My job is to help each of you adjust your behavior for the betterment of yourself, your partner, and your relationship. In doing this, you can make an informed decision about the future. With that being said, if you and your partner come to the place where the decision to end the relationship is on the table, I will walk through that with you.
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Definitely not! Many partners come in because they want outside help before making a major life decision such as getting married, moving in together, etc. In fact, you don’t even need to be partnered to benefit from the type of skills a person learns in therapy. Lots of people come into therapy to process through and learn from a break up or a divorce, or to work on themselves so they can be a better future partner.
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Getting started is easy! Just contact me with any questions or concerns, or to schedule your first therapy session.
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Couples therapy in Salem is conducted 100% online. I use a secure, HIPAA-compliant video platform that is simple to use.
Emergency Mental Health Resources in Salem, Massachusetts
Driving directions to Salem, Massachusetts
From the North: Take I-95 South to Route 128 North. Take exit 40A and follow Route 114 East into Salem.
From the South: Take I-95 North to Route 128 North. Take exit 40A and follow Route 114 East into Salem.
From the East: Take Route 107 West or Route 1A South, which will lead you into Salem from the east.
From the West: Take Route 114 East into Salem, following the signs to the Salem Visitor Center.
About Salem, Massachusetts
Salem, Massachusetts is a coastal city located in Essex County, about sixteen miles north of Boston.
It is famous for its association with the Salem Witch Trials of 1692, one of the most infamous cases of mass hysteria in American history.
Important landmarks include the Salem Witch Memorial, the House of the Seven Gables made famous by Nathaniel Hawthorne, and the Peabody Essex Museum with its impressive collection of Asian art and culture.
People are drawn to Salem for its rich history, haunted happenings and witch trial reenactments around Halloween, as well as its picturesque waterfront areas.
The city offers a unique blend of the modern and historical, with boutique shops, restaurants, and annual events like the Salem Arts Festival.